Friday, February 26, 2010

#68 Prison Talk; Fear of prison (retro)

Prison Talk: The Fear of Prison

It is way too easy for me to go online and do a simple search for places where there are people scared out of their wits about a loved one going to prison. There are lots of things that can decline in numbers or volume, but there may always be people going to jail or prison, and as such, there will always be people who are worried about them.

This then creates a fear of prison, something I have blogged about before, but how many of you really understand what that is?

I was reading a post somewhere this morning where a lady was so worried about her son who got sent to prison for 5 years, and was asking for advice. As usual, the people there knew nothing about prison and spent more time saying the “if he did the crime, he’s got to do the time” and that kinda stuff.

Folks…she didn’t come to be slapped with that kinda talk…she came for help. She came because she has a great fear about her son going to prison, and what might happen. Some of the comments I read were so ignorant that this concerned mom might as well give up and just HOPE that her son will live through this difficult situation.

See, part of the problem here is the venue of help is bogus. She isn’t really talking to people who CARE about her or her loved one, they just want to get on a soapbox and tell her stuff she already knows.

If I a deep in debt and need help, I don’t want to go talk to somebody who’s gonna remind me of my faults, I need somebody who can help me get through this. Even if that means facing the faults, there still has to be some hope at the end of the lecture.

Anybody who cannot give you a light at the end of their sermon should have never opened their mouth to begin with. You will NEVER find a chance to fight prison fear when you talk to people who don’t know how to end a discussion on a high note.

And that’s what you are looking for.

When you have fear for a loved one in prison, you are looking for answers, or at least some comfort that things can get better. For that lady who has a son in prison, there are many, many fears that run through her head, some are real, some are based on the fear of prison.

We can discuss this in great detail, but none of it will mean a thing if you can’t get past the idea of your part in this. Sometimes folks, you can’t wait until things GET better before you release the fear, sometimes you have to take an active part in fighting fear. So to get started, ask yourself this simple question….

What are you REALLY afraid of with your loved one in prison?

When you can place a value to that question, THEN we can begin to address the issues and begin the fight to counter that fear. Most people have no idea how much influence they have in how a loved one gets through his sentence, both good and bad.

Think about that, and think about what you can do to help your loved one in prison. When you’re ready, then we’ll talk.

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