Monday, June 7, 2010

#226 Dealing with setbacks

Dealing with setbacks

So today didn’t turn out so good….

It’s just after 8pm as I blog my thoughts out, certainly the day didn’t go nearly as well as I thought it would have. Kinda a big swing on things I wanted to do, and it turned out I could not do very much at all.

If you read my previous blog, you know that I was about to send out some “Grades of Honor” books, and some other cards, because I had received a couple of gifts and orders for the books. The plan was to ask my mom to cash them so I can have the money to get the books bound at Staples, and get a large envelope to send them with. It would have also afforded me the opportunity to get some more ink, and maybe a few supplies…and maybe a McDonalds treat here or there…but who’s to say?

I was home getting everything ready to go when my mom called to tell me that they would not accept third party checks or money orders. My heart sank as she told me that, and was powerless to do anything about it. I was counting on that so I can do some things, but now with those checks and money orders void to the bank, and since I had no account in any bank, I was just holding paper. Mom tried to come up with some other ideas, but I felt that maybe it was best to just send the checks and money orders back until we found a better idea. If I could not send what I promised, it would not be fair to hold on to somebody’s money.

And I am sure there are places that might cash it, but at some higher percentage of the check or money order. It reminded me of when I did have a bank account, and got a money order from a reader in Canada. I found out that for my bank to cash a check that originates outside the US, it would cost me $75! But the check was only for $50. So I would have to PAY my bank to cash a check, and be $25 behind the curve.

As the game show says…”no deal”…

So I felt kinda down after deciding that it was best to send the money back. But I also had to push myself to do something else…I had to make good on my effort. I might not have been able to send the books, but I can send the money back, plus a few extra things to hopefully keep their trust.

I went back to my room, got some large flat envelopes and sorted a few of my prison cards, and some prison encouragement certificates, and a flyer or two. I put one of each in the envelopes, along with the check or money order to that person. They were going to supporters in New York, Alaska, two in Texas and one in Missouri. I really felt bad sending that back, but under the circumstances, I just didn’t have a choice.

I also emailed each one of them, letting them know what was going on, before mailed the packets out. I blogged afterwards that the only ways I can get this to work in my favor is for the supporter or person ordering to either send the check or money order in my mom’s name, or if you are sending cash, that would work as well. Every now and then I get a nice card with a few dollars in it, to support my blogs, so it does happen.

I got the remaining stamps I had left and put them on the envelopes, and took some change just in case I needed a few more pennies on it. I went to the post office and mailed them out as soon as I could. It was the best I could do, with the circumstances of my new setback.

I came home and played video games to get my mind off of it.

Even now, I am pretty disappointed, but it wasn’t like it was the end of the world. Anyone who sent me money will get it back, since I could not cash it anyway, and there are still venues for me to get something going on. Its weird how banks can take so many steps to protect their money, which seem to be becoming more and more an exclusive service ONLY if you are THEIR customer.

A few years ago I had a lot of $1s and I wanted to go to a bank and exchange it for couple of $20s. I went in the bank that day, and walked to the teller and asked her if I could do so….

She asked if I had an account there, and I am wondering why this was important. But because I did not have an account, they would not exchange the currency with me.

I just don’t get the stupidity of that. How is exchanging money going to hurt your bank? What is the risk of me giving you 20 or 40 one dollar bills for two 20 dollar bills? Nobody makes counterfeit ones! I was very angry at the implication of what she was saying, but powerless to make a point. I left the bank, promising to NEVER do business with them again.

Funny, a few days ago we drove by that bank, and it is no longer there, maybe it moved, or maybe it failed…locally owned banks tend to do that when they aren’t as friendly as they claim to be.

But apparently more and more banks are getting tight with their services unless you have an account with them. And right now I don’t have an account with anybody, at least not yet. So this might take longer to do than I hoped. I might have to take some time off from writing to kinda get my head straight on this. Kinda hard to make this a business venture and help others if I can’t lift my feet off the ground.

It has not stopped me from writing, just kinda forces me to consider other things. Me asking for support or people to buy my works just got a little harder, but not impossible. So perhaps that is what I need to do for awhile folks. I actually really wanted to respond to a comment I got a day or so ago, from a guy who was concerned about going to prison. He had written such a sincere comment that I emailed him and hopefully will hear from him so I can talk about what he can do. At the same time, there is another person who is in a similar situation, that I wanted to keep encouraged.

These are the times folks, when thing go south, that you have to keep believing that somehow, someway, things are gonna get better. But to do that, you have to have faith in a foundation that is strong. I have to believe that today was just a setback, nothing to fall apart on. Granted I feel crappy right now, but deep down, I know that things can change in my favor in an instant. So I suppose I feel down right now, but I continue to believe that I will be fine.

That’s faith, in the eye of the problem. When you can at least attempt that, you are on the right path, regardless of what your prison issue is.

So I’ll leave it at that folks, unless I get some influx of emails, comments, support and the like, it might be cool to just kinda fade out for awhile. Until then…

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